Friday, June 10, 2005

I have this song in my head, it's one that we did across the floor exercises to in one of my modern dance classes...

"here I go again on my own...like a drifter I was born to walk alone"

I did a search and it is by WhiteSnake (Here I Go Again), oh the glories of bad 80s rock music.

Another one that has been going through my head is a very special adaptation of the Monchichi song from the commercial. ("Monchichi, Monchichi, Oh so soft and cuddly"), my version goes like this:

"My baby, dead baby. Not so soft and cuddly."

(It's my blog, I can say what I want. I never did own a Monchichi by the way, they came out when I was out of their target age range and I don't think I would have enjoyed them at all)

Yesterday's special phrase, my mantra of sorts for the anniversary of my first BFP coupled with the news of my second failed pregnancy was:

deadbaby
deadbaby
deadbaby
deadbaby
deadbaby
deadbaby
deadbaby

Oh and for the complete and total irony of the situation, since I had that fibroid surgery and I'm not allowed to go through labor for fear of rupturing my uterus and killing my baby (well, someday I might get that far) the only time I ever get to experience labor is through my miscarriages. How pleasant.

1 comment:

Anna H. said...

What a couple of days this has been for you...

Yep, there are some crazy, really screwed up ironies associated with fibroids and infertility and loss. I'm so sorry that you have to be experiencing any of them.

Thinking of you.

xxoo