Friday, October 21, 2005

More normal

AF's been a lot more normal this cycle though I'm still amazed at how much less bleeding I have since my fibroid was removed.

Then since my acu was so excited by my last two charts (38 & 39) I reflected on some of my previous symptoms that have improved starting from the beginning (3 1/2 years ago) when I had spotting when I ovulated, to liver qi stagnation jaggy temps (look how bad one tx from my naturopath made my temps), or my mid-LP temp slump. Based on that history, my latest charts are really wonderful signs of improvement.

This past LP I didn't have a big night sweat (sweat rolling off of me kind of sweat) until the night before AF started and my feet had been warmer up until a few days before AF was due when they got cold again.

My partner said he would go in to see them and get the herbs. I sure hope they work.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Who's not disappointed?

So AF arrived today, my yeast infection cleared up with one treatment (the one that kicked in two night ago with a raging itch and burn), and I'm feeling okay but tired.

At acu this morning my acu was disappointed that I wasn't pg, she was sure from looking at my charts that we were getting closer. So we talked about my partner's MFI and low morphology, his basic health deal and she thought that getting him on some herbs would help. From the symptoms that I described to her, she said it sounds like he's got some damp heat, kidney and spleen issues. I also agree that it is time to readdress the MFI factor and make sure that we've done everything we can.

Today I feel frustrated but there's nothing I can do about that. I hope I can get my guy to do the 1/2 hour appt. and take the chinese herbs -- for some reason he seems skeptical of chinese medicine though he takes herbs for panic-anxiety and stress -- what's the difference?

I've just started my 40th cycle. Hooray for round numbers. (note sarcasm)

Monday, October 17, 2005

No Hope

I really, really don't think it will be a BFP in the morning. It's deductive reasoning. 12dpo and nothing, not even a faint mark? If that was implantation spotting last week then something sure didn't take that 5 days later there is nothing on an HPT.

It could easily have been related to my spleen qi deficiency. My spleen/stomach channel were all messed up by my illness last week. My tongue was super coated with white -- it looked awful.

I want a BFP as much (if not more) than the (average) next gal but I just am not feeling it. It's weird isn't it how you can convince yourself you are and then just as easily convince yourself that you are not.

No it doesn't get any easier.

It doesn't get any easier

I decided to use one of the 3-pack tests I bought this afternoon when I got home just now. I stared at it and stared at it and watched the dye flow past window number one, grab onto the line in window number two and then studied window number one under several different light sources and at several angles until I finally decided to lay it down and walk away. BFnothing. Nada. No how.

Maybe I'm just jacked this LP, with the bronchitis and spotting, digestive issues -- maybe my body is a bit trashed at the moment. I'll give the tests one more chance but it isn't looking good. So much for that little jump today though.


Obsessing again of course and right now I've been looking at the various sites to see which HPTs have the best sensitivity. I'm not going to use an FRE or Answer this time, I'm going to try Fact Plus and hopefully that will give me a better read tomorrow.

My partner has been rubbing my tummy and asking me if I'm pregnant which isn't like him at all. I haven't told him anything about my spotting or other symptoms so that's pretty weird.

If I'm not pregnant then I'm sure having a very weird LP this cycle.

Small temp jump this AM

I know that I'm prone to get them prior to AF's arrival though. Feeling a little boggy in the uterine area though and yesterday afternoon I passed out for a three hour nap. I'm not testing again until tomorrow, I'll pick up some tests today while at work. Hmmmmmm...