Monday, January 23, 2006

Sometimes a pregnancy goes by like a vapor

Today was my EDD for my second pregnancy. I know two other online gals who had that due date -- one is in labor today (how perfectly on time!) and I've not caught up on the details of the other gal.

What helped me last year with the EDD of my first loss was to consider the week before to be a time to help come to closure about it. I was sort of forced to do it by the birth of my niece that same week -- based on advice from women online I bit the bullet and went to see her on the day she was born at the hospital. Yeah I cried a little too but I feel like I was able to change my perspective a little.

Since my surgery would have required me to deliver by c-section early, the second baby would have already arrived so in that sense there is no date for it really, it just would be here already. I don't have time to take off from work right now so I'm just trying to find some resolution about it.

Now, my niece's first birthday in a couple weeks might be more difficult (I still have some tension when I'm around her) but whatcha gonna do.

For all my stocism thought I'm still feeling a bit mucky about it. But it's been a long time since I was pregnant though so how could I really feel it, it's not like I was physically about to have a baby today. And from visiting with my niece yesterday, it's not like I know anything about the minutes/hours/days/weeks/months of attention that it has taken to get her to this point where she is taking her first steps. My past year (and then some) have been about a different journey.

1 comment:

nikole said...

Hi, you. Just wondering if you ended up doing anything, like a ritual or ceremony, to help you with closure before your EDD. I think it would be really helpful for me, but I haven't come up with anything that feels right yet.

I know this week has been difficult for you, and I'm sending you lots of love and positive energy (all the way from the East coast). You are a strong and inspiring woman.