Can you hear me growling and snarling? I'm having some mean PMS. My acu said it is a liver qi thing, as I also suspected. If not for my son's nursing and food sensitivities I would be all over the nearest comfort food I could find. As it us I had a chocolate chip cookie and a brownie this afternoon, but i was feeling so glum about my cat (and this crap PMS) that I just needed to indulge.

I want a vacation on an island where it is warm and quiet and I can sleep all day if I want.

Hopefully tomorow will be a better day, all this emotional upset is awful for the liver qi.

Ack, moodiness

The longer I go post-partum the more my body gets its cycle hormones back into gear and the more I start to feel the affects again. Blah. I'm just sitting here minding my own business after ovulating on Monday and a wave of despair just passed right over me.

I've been grateful for the break that being pregnant and nursing has given me from my awful PMS. Having these alternate hormonal realities really points out to me how it is likely our species, the female of our species, weren't really intended to go on having period after period after period for 22+ years straight. No wonder my hormones were over the top. Whether we like it or not I think our bodies were intended to switch into pregnancy and nursing and get a break from all the mood swings that come with menstruation.

We did give it a good try for this cycle and then I went in for an acupuncture visit on Tuesday. She was only able to tonify as we had tried but it was good to get that going again. If this cycle doesn't work out for us then I'll go back for regular treatment to see about helping get my body more baby ready for #2. Still there's a part of me that wonders what we are in for -- an easier time? more of the same (miscarriages, infertility)? It is hard to say how I will feel if we start to revisit some of the sadder places in TTC land.

PMS Induced Mastalgia

Oh yeah, it's that time of the month -- time for sore breasts. My breasts have been killing me and I've been so freaking bloated during my LP that it is not even funny. I haven't been able to get to acu due to travelling out of town but I do have a massage scheduled for this Thursday afternoon. Yesterday morning I took a look back at my blog posts about PMS, estrogen and the like and came across my info about elevated estrogen, prolactin and then vitex to treat the same. I decided that I had to try something as I was just about to DIE or burst or something like that. I took 10 drops in a glass of water and by the time I got to work I was like crazy get-out-of-town peeing. It was like my body randomly decided to drop all that water -- well actually it felt more like the vitex coaxed it out of me. My breasts are still sore but not nearly as bad and my belly doesn't look like a balloon (though I swear my ankle are looking a little bloated still). I think I'm going to keep trying the vitex for a few days more to see if it takes my edge off.

So here's my question to you all, if I've had my prolactin checked and it has been fine then why does it seem like that might be the problem? I've also got that weird headache back, like right between my frontal lobes. I keep getting it during my LP, since January. What the heck is wrong with me and my stupid hormones! The problem is that I don't feel like any of my docs will really listen to me and if they give me a med it will likely be something really nasty. Grrrrr.

I have been feeling bit less painful today thankfully. Maybe I'm onto something.

Here are some links about breast pain, cyclic mastalgia specifically, that you might find interesting.

Cyclic Mastalgia

Painful Breasts

Severity of Mastalgia in Relation to Milk Duct Dilatation

Toremifen May Be Helpful for Mastalgia

Info about Vitex for PMS/mastalgia

Holding up

I'm in the middle of my luteal phase and my breasts aren't killing me. Hows' that for an improvement? I think the acupuncture is helping out.

We went out with friends the other night and I wasn't drinking and I mentioned it was a chinese medicine/acupuncture thing and our friend's girlfriend who is an ear-nose-throat doctor asked me about it. I was dubious of how interested she was but I mentioned that I was having bad PMS, nausea for the better part of five weeks, really bad congestion and post-nasal drip, etc. Her response? That it was probably gastro-esophogeal reflux and that there's medication for that. I said I don't think acid reflux gives you bad PMS, and then she said, well no... I said that the dietary changes and the acupuncture and herbs seemed to be helping and the nausea was now gone. She said it was probably coincidence to which I replied I was sure that it wasn't. Oh sigh.

I went for a massage today, the first time that I've seen this practioner since September 2004. She practices Lomi Lomi massage, a technique that comes from Hawaii. Sometimes she chants during the massage, and she usually starts out with a type of prayer, but she always checks in with you on an emotional level before she starts so she can help use the time for more healing. When she asked how I was doing I said pretty good. But then I told her about the recent EDD and anniversary and I started getting teary. I filled her in a little about the second loss, about my frustrations with Western medicine having nothing really to offer since they don't really listen, and about how depleted I've felt since last June.

We started into the massage and I started crying a bit, it was hard just being touched. Before I got there I thought I might fall asleep during the massage but there was no chance of that happening. She worked a lot on opening up my hips and that didn't hurt but it felt like there was a little grief hidden there. Then I asked her to do some abdominal work and when she started doing that it felt like there was a big tight knot in the middle there. So she pulled back some and started asking me to do some visualizations and breathing and after a while my hands started buzzing, sort of like an electric shock but ongoing. She had placed one hand on my heart and the other on my belly and they were just buzzing and buzzing with energy. Then suddenly I started sobbing and crying and it was really intense, I told her I supposed I had been holding a lot of grief in there. She told me to just cry if I needed to and the tears rolled down the sides of my face into my ears and down my neck. Big fat tears.

She told me to breathe in and on the exhale to direct hope, or light or healing to the part of me where I'm holding my grief. I kept thinking of it like my shadow, a full body of myself but only a few inches thick that was dark and I held in my back. She asked me to acknowledge the place in my center, to ask it if it had a name or perhaps a shape -- what came to mind was the color green and the shape of a kidney bean. It was so odd and emotionally intense.

I'm going to go back for another massage in a few weeks to keep trying to resolve this, to help my body move on more. It's amazing what you can find hidden inside the folds and curves of your body.

More Thoughts About Fibrocystic Breasts

So the common things they say to do if you are having PMS and fibrocystic breasts are:

Increase calcium consumption

Decrease caffeine consumption

Make sure there isn't a thyroid problem

Cut back on refined sugars

Increase dietary fiber

Increase B-vitamin consumption

Increase magnesium consumption

Drink more water

Use natural progesterone cream

Increase vitamin E consumption



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So I used to eat a fair amount of dairy and I had bad PMS but cutting back to almost none hasn't made any difference so dairy doesn't seem to do anything for me favorable. Less dairy does seem to help with my allergies and digestion so I'm going to stick with that plan.

I've always been a very moderate consumer of caffeine, I didn't drink coffee or cola. I do eat chocolate and have some black or green tea but in moderation. So, that didn't seem to make any difference at all -- in fact I recently started drinking a little more coffee than usual (a few time a week instead of once a month) and it's made no difference.

I've had my thyroid checked several times including a full thyroid panel last summer as it comes up as related to many of my conditions (fibroids, elevated estrogen, PMS) -- each time the test results were so normal it was boring. My mother has thyroid trouble so I thought for sure this might be related for me but evidently not.

Due to my naturopathic and TCM treatment I was told to cut back on refined sugars. It's helped me to feel better but I was never a total nut about eating candy or anything. I've made a concious effort to be careful about my intake of simple carbs. Still I've got sore breast in my luteal phase.

Increase of dietary fiber does seem to help me feel better generally but it hasn't seemed to help with the breast issue at all. Since this helps your body to eliminate excess estrogen I'm sticking with this for general health.

I eat a largely vegetarian diet (though I am an omnivore) and the foods I eat contain a lot of vitamin B and magnesium. Stress depletes b-levels and my work can be stressful and sometimes I don't get enough foods rich in vitamins B or magnesium but I really do try. I was never on birth control pills which can rob the body of B vitamins and magnesium so that's not an issue with me. I have been trying to be better about taking my vitamins but the best I usually do is 4 times a week -- better than nothing in my book.

I am bad about drinking enough water every day -- mostly when I'm at work. I'm much better than I used to be I think.

Natural progesterone cream didn't really seem to do much to help, maybe a little, but it mostly makes my breasts seem to swell more, not necessarily become more lumpy or sore.

And then there's the Vitamin E thing. It's in my prenatal and that on it's own doesn't seem to do anything.

But then there's that DIM/Vitamin E thing. It really did seem to help over the past three days. Today I'm spotting so AF is just around the corner but previously I used to not have my breast stop hurting until I had full-blown AF. It seems so curious to me. And some of the links I've found mention that vitamin E can increase estrogen levels, and also that DIM might do the same -- it just doesn't seem to be doing that to me -- it seems to be helping something hormonally.

Bad Estrogen

Sounds dramatic doesn't it but there really is estrogen known to be the bad kind, the kind that can lead to cancer. Since I'm not doing acu treatment or chinese herbs right now and its just up to me to try to fix me I decided to do some more research into PMS and estrogen. It's that time of the month (mid-luteal phase) and my breasts are so uncomfortable. The only time I've had real relief for a while was after both pregnancies, I guess due to the pregnancy types of estrogen being dominant then.

So here are some of the links I came across that interested me:

Predictors of the plasma ratio of 2-hydroxyestrone to 16-hydroxyestrone among pre-menopausal, nulliparous women from four ethnic groups

The relationship between physical activity and 2-hydroxyestrone, 16alpha-hydroxyestrone, and the 2/16 ratio in premenopausal women

DIM (Di-Indoly Methane)For Natural Protection from Estrogen's Effects

What I picked out that might relate to me are:

...that since dietary therapy alone hasn't helped, and my mother had PMS as well that there might be a heriditary factor.

...that exercise really might help my body to metabolize the bad estrogen more

...that taking DIM for a while might not be such a bad idea, at least to see if I can detect any changes.

DIM Plus for PMS? (and more about estrogen excretion)

On one of the discussion groups about healing fibroids naturally I learned about this dietary supplement called DIM Plus which was supposed to help your body rid itself of excess estrogen. Evidently some of the cancer circles were talking about it. I bought some a while back and tried it for a week or so, no side effects that I could see but since I was doing chinese herbs and trying to get pregnant and you aren't meant to take it if you are pregnant I didn't continue using it.

Well, with my breasts sore as ever for the second luteal phase in a row, I decided finally yesterday to take one capsule to see if it would help. Forget just about the fertility stuff for a minute and know that for me, feeling bad PMS symptoms mean that my body is still lined up for more fibroids -- something I really don't want. The recommended dose is 2 capsules but I took just the one, and then coincidence or not my breast pain receded. They are still sensitive and full and fibrocystic but not just aching me outright now. Was it possibly the DIM Plus?

Here's the link to the product page on the manufacturer's site:

DIM Plus by Nature's Way

Estrogen Metabolism and the Diet-Cancer Connection: Rationale for Assessing the Ratio of Urinary Hydroxylated Estrogen Metabolites (PDF)

Hormone Balance - Hormonal Health (about DIM)

Physiological Functions of Phytonutrients (PDF - info about DIM starts on p.9)

Foods for Cancer Prevention

Estrogen Dominance Syndrome

Nutritional Factors in Menstrual Pain and Premenstrual Syndrome

Liver Detoxification Pathways

Estrogen's Two-Way Street

Premenstrual Syndrome Types -- I mighta have posted this link elsewhere in this blog, but it might be helpful to you in this context so here it is.


It makes me think, why is it that many doctors don't consider things a problem until they might kill you? Why do I have to live with hormonal imbalance and cyclic breast pain for years. Pooh on them. And honestly I've tried the no caffeine, no dairy, no meat, no alcohol approaches and they didn't help me. No chocolate, well that's not really an option and my acu told me that with Spleen Qi deficiency it was a common craving. Like pica (craving and eating clay and ice and stuff) I guess but better.

Should I be happy or sad?

Ah sh*t I'll just be cranky, the PMS is really doing me in this month. All the acu and herbs and diet changes and here I find myself back at square one. At least I know how to manage my stress better and I can fight my anemia a little better without the heavy periods. My breasts are killing me, I'm feeling uncharitable to say the least and I would love to just go home and sulk by myself for the rest of the day.

I also think I'm coming down with a cold -- I'm sneezing and mid-LP my immunity always plummets. My theory is that it has something to do either with the hormones or the anemia or perhaps both. Progesterone compromises your immunity slightly and then with my body devoting more blood resources to building up my endometrium this time of month maybe it just tweaks my anemia and my resistance slumps. Who knows.

I've found out in the past day that two of my fibroid sisters are pregnant now, both moving along okay so it seems. I coached both of them through the pre-myo stress and now they are going to have babies. Considering how many more women with fibroids I know online who aren't getting pregnant I should be celebrating the miracle. Me, I just feel a bit dejected. I think I would rather know that someone in a similar situation to mine was having success but still it bites a bit.

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Is anyone actually reading this blog? I get so few comments that it makes me feel like I'm a bad blogger or something. I appreciate the few of you who drop notes now and again. Thanks so much for your continued support.

I hate this time of the cycle

Actually I've gotten to where I hate most times during my cycle, though honestly Amy period is at least old hat at this point (after 21 years in September!). I'm grouchy at ovulation, I'm moody during my luteal phase, even the pre-ovulatory time of month can get my goat. I think that it's always been this way but I didn't know so much about what was going on with my hormonal system -- is it really this good to be so in tune with one's hormonal fluctuations.

At any rate I'm at 11dpo today and yesterday my basel temp dipped below my coverline (how's that for jargon for your non sympto-thermal charters) and then this morning I had a wee little temp rise again but only by a few degrees (97.8 to 98.0 -- actually my temp was 98.1 overnight but then it dropped by 6:30 this morning). So I'm straddling something vaguely interesting again, part of me wanting it to be something and a lot of me knowing that I may well get my period by the end of the week.

I have no home pregnancy tests at home at any rate, my friend told me to wait until I had a couple days of temps after the rise and then to see. I live and work within walking distance of six drugstores so if I want one I can get one any time. By the way, I hate buying pregnancy tests, especially when the checkout person is a guy. They sort of search your face for a moment and try to figure out if you are testing because you hope you are or if you hope you are not. For me though, I feel both things at the same time -- at it all feels incredibly emotionally loaded to me either way. At least when you buy sanitary napkins they will usually look away, not trying to draw attention to the feminine hygiene products.

There's just no winning.

Since I got pg last spring I've noticed some changes in my cycle. Some of the changes are hard to know if they are sticking around since I had retained tissue until my surgery and second d&c in November and my body is still healing from the surgery. Still, there are some things like fibrocystic breasts that I've not experienced since before my BFP.

Here's what I've noticed:

BEFORE AF is heavy but fluctuates between flooding, clotting, heavy flow and medium flow and lasts at least 7 days Goes directly from period (AF for Aunt Flo) into lots of cervical fluid (CF) Copious fertile quality CF for 5 days before ovulation Full, sore breasts during luteal phase (LP) Really moody during LP Pimples on chin during LP Nightsweats during LP Half day of spot before AF arrives

AFTER AF is really heavy and fluctuates between straight blood (bright red), little to no clotting, heavy flow and medium flow and lasts at least 6 days Slow start on CF after AF, definately drier CM for 5 days before ovulation, mostly creamy and not really wet Pimples on chin around ovulation Scant EWCF for a day or two at most Full breasts in the LP, they don't hurt Tired during LP Faint pimples on chin during LP Nightsweats during LP and throughout the cycle Several days of spot before AF arrives

I'm going to be working with my acupuncturist again starting this week, hopefully that helps out a lot. I've been trying to address my post-surgery depletion with my diet as well but I may have to meet with my naturopath if I think I need more help on that end of things. It's so wacky to have things be so different even though my diet and lifestyle isn't that different.

Nutrition and medicine

"The doctors of the future will give no medicine, but will interest his patient in the care of the human frame, in diet and in the cause and prevention of disease."

--Thomas Edison


In case you didn't know, most medical schools do not offer adequate training in nutrition to medical students -- even today. Ever notice that most doctors won't even ask you if you are getting enough rest or drinking enough water? We could be living on potato chips for all they know.

Naturopathic medicine in contrast focuses on the body's ability to heal itself and nutrition is a key part of this -- hence why some of us have had some improvement of health while under the care of naturopaths. In the ideal world of the future all doctors will look at us holistically and help identify imbalances before they become issues. I'm not saying naturopathy is better than allopathic (western) medicine, but I am saying that you will feel a bit better cared for since they try to get to the bottom of the causes of what ails you -- including psychological, spiritual, emotional, causes, etc. I got my anemia finally in check after other doctors telling me that it was normal for some people -- and I'm feeling much better now.

Since we know that western doctors aren't getting this training it is important that we seek out information about the role of nutrution in our health issues on our own. Doctors might even agree with you when you ask if you should be taking B-12 for instance, it just might not be something they offer you on their own.

Here are a couple links to learn more:

Nutrition Education in U.S. Medical Schools (1985)
Commission on Life Sciences (CLS)

Naturopathic Medicine - Philosophy

Oh, and if you are interested in controlling bad cramping pain then you might consider some of the suggestion for controlling prostaglandin production on these pages:

What causes Menstrual Cramps and Pain (Western and Oriental Medical
Perspective)

25 Ways To Handle PMS

I'm feeling pretty good so far. My PMS is enough to contend with and this seems a lot easier to deal with -- just feeling a little queasy (almost barely) and then there are I guess some light cramps. My breasts are a little fuller but you would have to be intimate with them to notice, they actually hurt less than they did last week when I was PMS-ing.

Honestly for those of you who haven't been pg before it isn't earth shattering necessarily (which in my head it always seemed like it was). It is like a natural progression of the menstrual cycle which I usually describe as being a test cycle each month to help things tuned up and ready to go.