Things you can do to prepare yourself for the prospect of surgery that I found helpful

* Meditate on it -- I walked a labrinth, a type of meditational maze, and thought about my fibroid. After a while I was able to work through what I was afraid of and see that I was going to be okay. It was pretty amazing for me.

* Read Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster -- this book is very soothing and helps you see how to look at the surgery and put yourself in a good mental space for healing. I wish I would have read it sooner.

* Watch a webclip of the surgery being performed -- this alleviates a lot of stress about this unknown. You can also read about it in What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Fibroids

* See what the scar looks like. I posted photos after my surgery to my blog and to the NUFF board and people have written back how helpful it was for them to see. This is my first post after my surgery to my blog, you can see more in the archives before and after that date -- about my decision-making to have the surgery and the healing afterwards.

Those are my best suggestions. The only other thing I might add is that you aren't the only one to have those conflicted feelings. It's our uterus and we're trying to have a baby -- having surgery on that part seems to be in total conflict with having a baby. But, as many of us here have seen, fibroids can also equally be damaging to our plans for babies, and if having them out will help us to get our babies than so be it. In 18 months of being on the NUFF board where there are thousands of members, I only recall one woman having a hyst and she had a cancerous tumor -- which isn't what you have. Everyone else still has theirs and more and more are having babies and getting pregnant all the time.

As for the prospect of a c-section delivery, I am trying to be true to myself and at the same time true to the situation and reality. My fibroid was preventing me from getting pg and I had to have it out if I want to have babies. Having it out changed the situation for delivery and since I've gone to such extremes to "make room for baby" I should just relax about it and focus on getting pg firstmost and then getting the best surgeon I can find and get along with.

I've been feeling a lot better over the past week though energy-wise so I've started running/walking with my dog each day around 5:30 or 6pm, right before the sun goes down. It really helps clear my head and help my body shift gears from work. The furthest I can run is 2 blocks but then we walk -- my dog and I are getting more exercise though this way than just walking and she (old girl that she is at 14 1/2) is loving it. I've also been practicing my qigong and doing acupressure to help with my stagnation.

Fibroids Increases Miscarriage Risk

I was just talking to some of my fibroid buddies online about the fact that our group, which is comprised of women with fibroids, has a much higher rate of miscarriage -- than even my miscarriage buddy group. I'm not surprised at these study findings, though the fact that they still know so little about where fibroids come from is frustrating (inner dialogue: "don't get frustrated, it blocks your liver qi")

Fibroids and miscarriage link

Early results from a pioneering study at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill indicate that small uterine fibroids are associated with an increased risk of miscarriage.

I'm 12 dpo today and I did an HPT which came up blaringly negative. I had all the symptoms too: sore breasts, moodiness, funny looking bumps on my areolae, no interest in sex, implantation spotting at 10-11 dpo. I'm trying not to obsess but really I haven't been able to get anything done today that is useful. I'm trying to obsess my way into getting pregnant but it isn't working out. Argh!