You've probably been checking in on me but I haven't been writing. I don't know, I guess I'm in a bit of denial about things. Sometimes I think it is going to work out, sometimes I brace myself for another loss and lots of the time I sort of just ignore it except for managing my symptoms.

I went camping for a few days which wasn't that much fun for me. It's hard to be out in the heat when your body is trying already to adjust to so many changes. Then there were the swarming mosquitoes, not fun for a pregnant person who is having to pee multiple times a night -- try not getting bites with your butt exposed. And there was my dog, who fell into the cold mountain river late at night because she was thirsty and her water dish was empty. We found her downriver the next morning, about 8 hours after she disappeared -- and evidently none the worse for wear. I've got a ton of bug bites and I'm tired and recovering.

I go in for my next ultrasound first thing tomorrow. I don't know what the news will be. I've seen too many friends online have a good first scan and a bad second scan to be too hopeful. All I can do is count out the things that I know:

sore boobs
slow digestion
contipation
fatigue
bloated belly
and my period hasn't been here in almost 2 months.